Happy Naked Year!!

A year in crime

Click HERE to see all the top 15 Mugshots from the Smoking Gun

Dont hold it in!!

Now there will be long lines at the Mens Room!!

Its about time we started moving to unisex bathrooms!!! Now I wont get yelled at for leaving the seat up. Can also not take all the blame for the seat being wet! I just would like to know what mens bathrooms are cleaner than womens???

Device for women to pee standing up

December 26, 2005

A PHYSICALLY challenging feat – women peeing while standing up – is now easily achieved thanks to a funnel-like device, its manufacturer claims

Brisbane-based company WhizBiz today said "The Whiz" fits snugly against the body to enable women to "take a stand" like their male counterparts and avoid smelly public toilets and long queues.

Invented two years ago in the United Kingdom, The Whiz is coated in an anti-bacterial agent so that it does not have to be cleaned and is reusable, WhizBiz spokesman Lachie Campbell said.

"It is coated with a high-tech plasma film developed by the British Army which repels fluid meaning women can pee, flick once to dry and stuff it in their handbag," Mr Campbell said.

He said the device had been trialled at music festivals such as the Big Day Out.

It was also suitable for women while they were camping, backpacking and holidaying where there was no access to toilets, or if they had bad backs, he said.

"Women can urinate standing up, anywhere that a male could with a more dignified and less exposed way than squatting because you can't find or wait for a toilet," Mr Campbell said.

AAP

This report was published at dailytelegraph.news.com.au

This shows you how to use it. Kinda interesting, you think??

I've got my eye on you!!!

I wanna know who is watching my blog. Email me, IM me, Snail mail me, make a comment. Do somthing!!!! Just remember, I will keep my eye out for you!!!

This is me watching you!!!<--Click it

Dont make me take the other one out!!!

What the f___ is the internet??

We all know that it isn't polite to use the "F" word! There are only ten times in history the "F" word has been acceptable for use:

10. "What the f___ was that?" - Mayor Of Hiroshima, 1945

9. "Look at all them f___ing Indians!" - Custer, 1876

8. "Any f___ing idiot could understand that." - Einstein, 1938

7. "It does so f___ing look like her!" - Picasso, 1926

6. "How the f___ did you work that out?" - Pythagorus, 126 BC

5. "You want WHAT on the f___ing ceiling?" - Michelangelo, 1566

4. "Where the f___ are we?" - Amelia Earhart, 1937

3. "Scattered f___ing showers....My ass!" - Noah, 4314 BC

2. "Aw c'mon. Who the f___'s going to find out?"- Bill Clinton, 1997

And number 1 . . . . . . . drum roll . . . . .

1. "Geez, I didn't think they'd get this f___ing mad." - Osama bin Laden

Thanks Lyn and Phylis!!

Lets get naked for Jesus!!!

Now I guess we need to make things equal and have a naked Satinist camp, naked Jewish camp (those guys should be easy to point out!!), a naked Wiccian camp, naked Kaballah camp (could Madonnna be the leader??), naked Hindu camp, naked Scientoligist (Go Katie!!!)..........

Christians to get naked

By Tony Allen-Mills

19-12-2005

From: The Australian

America's first 'Christian nudist camp' will soon open its doors for business / file

IN the beginning was the word of God and God never said anything about brassieres or boxer shorts. Thus was born Natura, America's first Christian nudist camp.

After two years of biblical debate over Adam and Eve and their fig leaves and whether or not nudity is sinful, a 67-year-old Quaker grandfather is preparing to open a modern-day Garden of Eden 65km north of Tampa, Florida.

Bill Martin's ambitious plan for an 80ha Christian-oriented Family Naturist Village has survived legal challenges, doctrinal disputes and a plague of internet prudes. Land is now being cleared for the opening next year of what may become the world's only Christian community to feature nude volleyball.

Despite howls of complaint from fundamentalists who have likened Martin to the Antichrist - and described his nudist plans as "graphic evidence of America's moral collapse" - Natura intends to build 50 houses around a non-denominational church where clothing for services will be optional.

He has fought with his neighbours over property rights, fallen out with other nudists over his promotional material and sparked a vigorous internet debate over whether the true path to godliness really involves getting naked.

Yet Martin remains confident that Christians will flock to Natura to experience the spiritual benefits of a lifestyle "free from body shame". He is spending more than $US2million ($2.68million) on a nudist recreational complex that will also feature a hotel, campsites and a children's water park.

(Entire story here)

Even worse Santa

Not really much I can say about this, kinda explains itself!!

Drunken Santas run riot in Auckland

WELLINGTON, New Zealand (AP) -- A group of 40 people dressed in Santa Claus outfits, many of them drunk, went on a rampage through Auckland, New Zealand's largest city, robbing stores, assaulting security guards and urinating from highway overpasses, police said Sunday.

The rampage, dubbed "Santarchy," began early Saturday afternoon when the men, wearing ill-fitting Santa costumes, threw beer bottles and urinated on cars from an overpass, said Auckland Central Police spokesman Noreen Hegarty.

She said the men then rushed through a central city park, overturning garbage containers, throwing bottles at passing cars and spraying graffiti on office buildings.

One man climbed the mooring line of a cruise ship before being ordered down by the captain. Other Santas, objecting when the man was arrested, attacked security staff, who were later treated by paramedics, Hegarty said.

The remaining Santas entered another downtown convenience store and carried off beer and soft drinks.

"They came in, said 'Merry Christmas' and then helped themselves," store owner Changa Manakynda said.

Two security guards were treated for cuts after being struck by beer bottles, Hegarty said. Three people, including the man who climbed on the cruise ship, were arrested and charged with drunkenness and disorderly behavior.

Alex Dyer, a spokesman for the group, said Santarchy was a worldwide movement designed to protest the commercialization of Christmas.

Copyright 2005 The Associated Press. All rights reserved.This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed.

I think I need a new coffee table

Yeah, its about time I get some new furniture. Wonder if there is a endtable that has a great place to slide your remote into???

Story stolen from http://www.ananova.com

Ananova:

Erotic furniture fad

Erotic furniture based on the female body with boobs for doors and bums for drawers is the latest fad in Holland.

Cabinet maker Mario Philippona has designed a range of stylish wooden cupboards, wardrobes and tables using the female anatomy as his inspiration.

His pieces include a wine-glass cupboard in the shape of a pair of large breasts and a table supported by legs moulded from a female model.

Philippona said: "The shape of a woman, her organic architecture, combined with my passion for wood inspired me to sculpt these sexy designs."

His furniture is featured on his website, www.sexyfurniture.nl.

Ho... Ho.... Ho????

A quick funny

Confessing Husband

This guy gets home, plaster-assed drunk, and stumbles into the bedroom, which wakes his wife. She notices he has a duck under his arm, and as he stands there, swaying side to side, he mutters "This is the pig I've been sleeping with"
His wife, disgusted by the condition he's in, says "You dumb ass. That's a Duck"
He says, "I wasn't talking to YOU"

Is that a tube of toothpaste, or are you happy to see me???

Guess you never really know where your groceries have been before you purchase them!!

BERLIN (Reuters) - Police in Germany arrested a shoplifter who filled his trousers with 39 tubes of toothpaste, authorities in the western town of Dueren said on Wednesday.

Police said store detectives in a supermarket chased the 37-year-old man after they saw him stuff the tubes into his pants, and forced him to hand over the goods.

It wasn't long before the toothpaste was once again available to customers.

"As far as I know, it was back on the shelves soon after," a police spokesman said.

I thought those English didnt have a problem with nudity!! I know I would love to be naked while I worked!

Naked and proud train engineer fired

LONDON, Dec. 8 (UPI) -- A train engineer in England has been fired for taking a photograph of himself naked while working and sending it to a colleague over his cell phone.

The unidentified man was running a train at 125 mph between London and Sheffield when the picture was taken, Sky News said.

"The driver has now been dismissed," said a Midland Main Line spokeswoman. "Safety is, and always will be, our main priority."

Meanwhile, The Sun reported it wasn't an isolated incident.

The newspaper said a number of drivers have reportedly taken up the hobby of stripping down before passing other trains, and encouraging fellow engineers to look at them as they speed past one another.

I would have went to see Santa for this!!!

Hot-Pink Thong Bothers Families Visiting Santa

ROANOKE, Va. -- Santa is keeping a secret -- a Victoria's Secret.

Some parents didn't like the idea of the young'uns seeing the skimpy underthings while visiting a mall Santa in Virginia. Now, there's a black curtain between Santa's chair and the Victoria's Secret store at the Valley View Mall in the Roanoke area.

Victoria's Secret has been featuring a window showing a leggy mannequin in a hot-pink thong and a bra. The theme of the display is "Give Me Sexy."

Mall spokeswoman Mandy York said they have no control over what Victoria's Secret puts in their window. But she said the black curtain seems to have satisfied the concerns of parents.

Copyright 2005 by The Associated Press. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.

Erotic moments from Bible...

BERLIN (Reuters) - A German Protestant youth group has put together a 2006 calendar with 12 staged photos depicting erotic scenes from the Bible, including a bare-breasted Delilah cutting Samson's hair and a nude Eve offering an apple.

"There's a whole range of biblical scriptures simply bursting with eroticism," said Stefan Wiest, the 32-year-old photographer who took the titillating pictures.

Anne Rohmer, 21, poses on a doorstep in garters and stockings as the prostitute Rahab, who is mentioned in both New and Old Testaments. "We wanted to represent the Bible in a different way and to interest young people," she told Reuters.

"Anyway, it doesn't say anywhere in the Bible that you are forbidden to show yourself nude."

Bernd Grasser, pastor of the church in Nuremberg where the calendar is being sold, was enthusiastic about the project which is explained online at www.bibelkalender.de. (BlackCrypts Note: Site has since been removed cause apparently there was a disclamer on there that some of the models were under 18. Those crazy Germans!!!!)

"It's just wonderful when teenagers commit themselves with their hair and their skin to the bible," he said.

It will be officially launched at the weekend.

I'm dreaming of a treeless Christmas!!

Good lord!!! The kids were learning, and some dumbass politician had to strike them down cause he has a problem with the scratch tickets. At least they are still calling it a Christmas tree and not a Holiday tree!!

Tree Decorated by Okla. Students Removed
By RON JENKINS, Associated Press Writer

A Christmas tree that elementary school students decorated with discarded lottery tickets was removed from the state Capitol over the weekend after a lawmaker complained it was inappropriate.

Rep. Randy Terrill, who opposes the lottery, said he spotted the tree on Wednesday when it was erected as part of the governor's annual Christmas tree lighting ceremony. The Republican lawmaker called the Westwood Elementary School principal, who apologized and asked the governor's office to remove the tree.

Sherry Fair, spokeswoman for Oklahoma City Public Schools, said the teachers and children did not intend to offend anyone. The teachers went to various convenience stores and got used lottery tickets, which were cut into various geometric shapes and placed on the tree.

"They had been studying about the lottery and understood that the lottery money benefits public schools," Fair said. "They came up with a theme about the gift of education."

Terrill said the principal had invited him to talk to students at the school.

Paul Sund, a spokesman for Gov. Brad Henry, said the governor's office had nothing to do with decorating the tree and referred questions to the school district. The office of the state school superintendent selects the schools that decorate the trees.

Copyright © 2005 The Associated Press. All rights reserved. The information contained in the AP News report may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed without the prior written authority of The Associated Press.

When movies take over real life

Police find semi-nude man inside Pavilion

By David Kranz
Argus Leader

November 15, 2005, 3:17 pm

A Sioux Falls man is charged with indecent exposure after being found partially unclothed and lying on the floor with a female mannequin in the Washington Pavilion.

Michael James Plentyhorse, 18, xxx N. Dakota Ave., was discovered by a Pavilion security officer at 4:35 p.m. Monday in the Washington High School Alumni Room, police said.

The guard observed Plentyhorse with his pants and underclothing down and lying next to the half-naked female mannequin, a police report states.

“There was inappropriate activity between him and the mannequin. That’s the only way I know how to put it,” Sioux Falls police officer Loren McManus said.

Security staff at the Pavilion say they have noticed the same mannequin has previously been found undressed on several occasions, McManus said.

No drugs or alcohol appear to have been involved.

I wanna hear the Redneck Monkey!!!

Ya'll want some nanners???

Monkeys have accents too, experts say

From correspondents in Tokyo

From: Agence France-Presse

TO the untrained ear monkeys of a certain species may all sound the same, but Japanese researchers have found that, like human beings, they actually have an accent depending on where they live.

The finding, the first of its kind, will appear in the December edition of a German scientific journal Ethology to be published on December 5, the primate researchers said.

"Differences between chattering by monkeys are like dialects of human beings," said Nobuo Masataka, professor of ethology at Kyoto University's Primate Research Institute.

The research team analyzed voice tones of two groups of the same species of primates, the Japanese Yakushima macaque also known as Macaca fuscata yakui, between 1990 and 2000.

One group was formed by 23 monkeys living on the southern Japanese island of Yakushima, and the other group comprised 30 descendants from the same tribe moved from the island to Mount Ohira, central Japan, in 1956.

The result showed that the island group had a tone about 110 hertz higher on average than the one taken to central Japan.

Monkeys on Yakushima Island have an accent with a higher tone because tall trees on the island tend to block their voice, Masataka said.

"On the other hand, monkeys on Mount Ohira do not have to gibber with a high tone as trees there are low," he said. "Each group adopted their own accent depending upon their environment."

This suggests differences in voice tones are not caused by genes, Masataka said, adding the results "may lead to a clue to the origin of human language."

Another follow up on the land story

Developer Buys Square-Inch Property On eBay

SPENCER, Ind. (AP) - A Michigan real estate developer was the highest bidder for a square-inch piece of land in Owen County, shelling out $1,752.60 for the parcel in a wooded ravine.

Andy Gutman, chief financial officer with NAI Farbman near Detroit, had the highest of nine bids and won the postage stamp-sized property on eBay.

Bidding on the .0000000159 of an acre started at $1,224 - the amount owned in back taxes, interest and fees after the land went unsold during a recent tax sale.

The online auction ended Thanksgiving evening.

Owen County attorney Richard Lorenz said he'll make final arrangements on Monday to transfer the deed for the land southeast of Terre Haute.

The Associated Press left messages seeking comment Saturday at Gutman's office.

One of the unsuccessful bidders, John Jadamed, of Japan, said he had planned to carry the land in his pocket if he'd won the property.

"I know it was a lot of money for a little bit of land, but something about it made me laugh and want to buy it," Jadamec said in an e-mail to the paper. "I still think it would have been fun to own."

At the per-square-inch selling price, an acre of the land would have cost more than $7 billion.

After the land's back taxes are paid - along with the $35 listing fee for eBay - First National Bank in Cloverdale will receive $492.92.

The CEO of the real estate company Gutman works for jokes that the company is "contemplating subdividing" the property. It's about the size of a postage stamp.

Copyright 2005 by The Associated Press. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.

I was asleep!!! Honestly!!!

For some reason, I don't buy into this story. But, if it is a real condition, it might help me out in the long run!! "Honey, I have a medical condition that makes me to that......."


Nah, probably won't work.

'Sexsomnia' defence works
By NATALIE PONA, SUN MEDIA

TORONTO -- It wasn't rape -- it was sleep sex.

In an unusual case in Scarborough court yesterday, Jan Luedecke was acquitted of sexual assault after a judge ruled he was asleep during the attack -- a disorder known as "sexsomnia."

"This is indeed a rare case ... His conduct was not voluntary," said Justice Russell Otter, as Luedecke's victim shook and sobbed then left the courtroom.

The judgement outraged women's groups.

"This is infuriating. It's another case of the courts not taking a woman seriously, adding yet another list to the list of excuses which men use for sexual assault," said Suzanne Jay, of the Canadian Association of Sexual Assault Centres.

Luedecke, a 33-year-old landscaper, met his victim at a party on July 6, 2003. Both had been drinking.

The woman, who can't be named, had fallen asleep on a couch. She woke up to find him having sex with her. She pushed him off then reported the rape to police. She didn't know Luedecke before that night.

WOKE UP ON FLOOR

Luedecke claimed he fell asleep on the same couch then woke up when he was thrown to the floor.

He only suspected he had had sex after using the bathroom and discovering he was still wearing a condom, court heard. He confessed to police.

During his trial, sleep expert Dr. Colin Shapiro testified Luedecke had parasomnia -- a disorder with symptoms such as sleepwalking. Shapiro testified Luedecke suffered from sexsomnia, which is sexual behaviour during sleep.

It was brought on by alcohol, sleep deprivation and genetics.

Luedecke had previously had sleep sex with four girlfriends, court heard.

The woman who accused Luedecke of raping her vows she will fight the decision to the Supreme Court.

"I believe the floodgates have been opened," she said. "This isn't the end for me personally. I have the means to pursue this to the highest level. I believe this case has set a precedent."

"For two years I have focused all my energy on this case. It's not stopping here," she said, in a phone interview yesterday afternoon. "I'm not a wimp but this has knocked me to my knees.

"I didn't think I could get back up for this -- but this isn't about me anymore, this is about society."

I feel ashamed to live in the same state as this guy.

This is a VERY disturbing story, thats why I didn't post it on here, just the link. Be forwarned, it involves a very sick and fucked up guy. Not a story for the faint of heart.

Charges Against Teen Upgraded After Dog He Allegedly Raped Dies

Maybe they would have stayed for some cold beer!

We need to get something like this going in the states!! There is not enough monkey appreciation going on around here!

Tourists Converge To Watch 17th Annual Monkey Banquet

LOPBURI, Thailand -- These were no party animals: Almost all the guests were too frightened to make an appearance, and the others ate and ran.

That didn't matter to the tourists who converged in Lopburi on Sunday to watch monkeys eat piles of fruits and vegetables during the 17th annual monkey banquet.

The party was thrown by local hotelier Yongyuth Kitwatananuson, who is thankful for the business the monkeys bring his city, 70 miles north of Bangkok.

The long-tailed macaques are regarded as disciples of Chao Pho Prakarn, a four-armed deity whose likeness is enshrined in the heart of town.

With such status, the monkeys are given free rein. They can be seen dropping peanut shells on street vendors, relieving themselves on curious onlookers and making merry on the electrical wires they use as footpaths. A sign at a local park says, "Beware of monkeys snatching your purse."

But Sunday's festival was a bust. The crowds and noise scared the monkeys off -- except for one or two dozen brave ones who stuffed themselves, leaving a terrible mess behind.

Copyright 2005 by The Associated Press. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.

Leggo my Lego's!!!!

I am almost 30 years old, and I still love Lego's, but this asshole took it to far!!! On a side note, anyone know where I can score some barcode stickers??

Reno Man Accused of $200,000 Legos Theft

Agents had to use a 20-foot truck to cart away the evidence from a suspect's house — mountains of Lego bricks.

William Swanberg, 40, of Reno, Nev., is accused of stealing hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of the colorful plastic building blocks.

Swanberg was indicted by a grand jury in Hillsboro, a Portland suburb, which charged him with stealing Lego sets from Target stores.

Target estimates Swanberg stole up to $200,000 worth of the brick sets pilfered from their stores in Oregon, Utah, Arizona, Nevada and California. The Legos were resold on the Internet, officials said.

Attempts to reach Swanberg at a county jail, where he was being held on $250,000 bail, were unsuccessful. It was not known if he had retained an attorney.

Swanberg is accused of switching the bar codes on Lego boxes, replacing an expensive one with a cheaper label, said Detective Troy Dolyniuk, a member of the Washington County fraud and identity theft enforcement team.

Target officials contacted police after noticing the same pattern at their stores in the five western states. A Target security guard stopped Swanberg at a Portland-area store Nov. 17, after he bought 10 boxes of the Star Wars Millennium Falcon set.

In his parked car, detectives found 56 of the Star Wars sets, valued at $99 each, as well as 27 other Lego sets. In a laptop found inside Swanberg's car, investigators also found the addresses of numerous Target stores in the Portland area, their locations carefully plotted on a mapping software.

Records of the Lego collector's Web site, Bricklink.Com, show that Swanberg has sold nearly $600,000 worth of Legos since 2002, said Dolyniuk.

Lego's Danish founder Ole Kirk Christiansen named the famous bricks in 1934 by fusing two Danish words, "leg" and "godt" meaning "play well."

Children across the world spend 5 billion hours every year playing with Lego bricks, available in 90 different colors, according to the company's Web site.

___

On the Net:

Lego: http://www.lego.com

Don't eat the yellow ice

The things us guys will do on a dare!!! I bet I might have done the same thing, and I also bet its been done a few times before!!


Student allegedly urinates in ice machine

The Associated Press
Friday, November 18th, 2005 01:51 PM (PST)

CARLISLE, Ky. (AP) - A Nicholas County High School student was suspended after he was accused of urinating in an ice machine that at least 31 people got ice from before the incident was reported.

Ben Buckler, chief of police for Nicholas County Schools, said another student dared the boy, who told officials he relieved himself in the ice machine in the gymnasium lobby just before physical education class Wednesday.

School law officials say charges will be filed, although officials were still trying to decide Thursday what to charge him with.

He was suspended for 10 days, pending an expulsion hearing.

Other students witnessed the incident, but it wasn't reported to Principal Doug Bechanan until Thursday morning. By the time the machine was taken out of service, some students and staff had taken ice from the machine.

School officials contacted the Department of Public Health in Frankfort.

"They said it was gross and morally wrong but not a health risk," Buckler said.

Health officials said urine is sterile because the body has its own filtering system. If any bacteria did make it through, the ice's temperature would have killed it.

But some students, parents and staff remained worried.

The Nicholas County School Board is picking up doctor bills "to ease the minds" of those who were exposed and want to be checked out anyway.

1st massage parlors, now tanning salons???

Now it makes sense why video stores with tanning salons in them keep the skin flicks behind doors!!!

Police: No Tanning Beds at S.C. Salon

Fri Nov 18, 5:02 PM ET

Undercover officers noticed something conspicuously absent from a tanning salon — tanning beds. The only tanning bed on the property of VIP Tann Spa was found in a wooden box on the porch, officer Jerry Miller said Thursday.

Miller said the so-called tanning salon was actually a very different kind of business: Three employees and two customers were charged with prostitution and related charges after the undercover visit last month.

The undercover officer found makeshift beds and other evidence people were being paid for sex, Miller said.

Investigators took business receipts, credit card statements and cash before closing the salon. The County Council revoked the owner's business license.

Update from the Land story

And it gets more interesting!!!! (First story here)Seems to want to be on the Pulse on eBay!!! I will be looking for it to actually be posted on there so I can post it here.

Square-Inch Plot of Land for Sale on eBay

Fri Nov 18, 5:05 PM ET

A square-inch parcel of land will be auctioned this week on eBay for a starting bid of $1,224, although Owen County officials say they've had offers for more.

The back taxes, with penalties and interest, total $1,224, which is all the county can collect, said county attorney Richard Lorenz. The rest would go to the bank that owns the land.

"Once we began to get all of these offers, we thought that to be fair we ought to sell it off to the highest bidder," he said. "We'll have it up on eBay for seven days."

The story was first reported last week when The Herald-Times of Bloomington found that a postage-stamp-sized piece of land in the county west of Bloomington had attracted not one bidder at a tax sale. There is a minimum bid of $1,500 for tax sale parcels.

Since then, Lorenz, county Auditor Angie Lawson and First National Bank in Cloverdale say they have fielded interest calls from CNN, NBC's "Today" show, television and radio stations from around the world and potential bidders.

"We've gotten probably 15 calls," Lawson said. "One of my staff was a clerk in Grant County and issued a marriage license to Lyle Lovett and Julia Roberts, and she said this had gotten more media attention than that did."

Linda Greenwell, Lorenz's secretary, said she can hardly get any work done.

"We've had calls from around the world — Israel, France, Germany, England, Australia," she said.

First National Bank in the 1960s foreclosed on a 1.12-acre parcel of land that the inch-square had been taken from, probably so a relative could have access to the nearby lake.

___

Information from: The Herald Times, http://www.hoosiertimes.com

Guess the nurse might listen next time!!

Ants eat away woman's eye
From correspondents in Kolkata
15nov05

A WOMAN receiving treatment for diabetes at a state-run hospital in eastern India lost one of her eyes after ants nibbled away at it, officials said today.

The patient recovering from a post-surgery infection shrieked for help as the ants attacked her on Sunday night, but nurses told her it was normal to feel pain from the infection.

Yesterday, the patient's family saw a gaping hole with swarming ants in it when they lifted the bandage on her left eye.

Authorities of the Sambhunath Hospital in Kolkata said they were probing the incident.

"It's not uncommon for ants to attack diabetic patients. We have set up a committee to investigate the unfortunate incident," hospital superintendent A Adhikary said.

Scampering rats and stray cats and dogs sharing bed space with patients are not uncommon sights at India's overcrowded state-run hospitals that are used by millions of poor and middle-class people.

How to survive a terrorist attack

Got this from a friend stationed over seas. The funniest thing about it is that the pics are from an actual US Government handbook!!

Click here to save your ass!!!

And to think, I moved away from here!!

I lived in Spencer for a while, but who knew that the land was so valuable? We have been thinking about moving back to the area, but now I am not sure we can afford it!!

1 Square Inch of Land for Sale at $1,500

By The Associated Press
The Associated Press
Saturday, November 12, 2005; 10:21 PM

SPENCER, Ind. -- A tiny parcel of land in southwest Indiana is some of the priciest real estate in the world. Owen County officials are trying to sell a 1-square-inch plot of land for $1,500. At that rate, an acre of land would cost nearly $7 billion.

No buyers ponied up for the postage-stamp-sized plot during a tax sale.

"It's too small to plant a flower on," said Peter Dorsey, with the county's mapping department.

The parcel was originally part of a 1.12-acre tract under a separate deed, said auditor Angie Lawson. Officials think the tiny piece of land west of Bloomington was deeded to someone in the 1960s, when people had to own property to use a nearby lake.

First National Bank foreclosed on the property owner's mortgage, which covered the entire 1.12-acre tract, and the land was up for bid at the tax sale. There is a minimum bid of $1,500 for tax sale parcels.

County attorney Richard Lorenz said he wants to find a way for the county to get rid of the land and the responsibility of selling it, perhaps by giving it away.

"Maybe we could donate that 1-inch plot to Owen County Preservations as the smallest land donation in history," Lorenz said.

© 2005 The Associated Press

And this storie was even picked up by the Australians!!!!!! Damn, that small 3 stoplight town with an old school Wal-Mart has made the big time!!!

Read the Aussie story here.

Gotta love us Clerks!!!

Store clerk found napping with pot

Associated Press
Nov. 9, 2005 10:30 AM MERRIMACK, N.H. - Police in New Hampshire say a convenience store clerk fell asleep on two jobs this week: minding the store and selling drugs.

Officers went to a 7-Eleven in Merrimack late Monday after a customer called police to report no one was in the store.

Police say two officers found the clerk sleeping in a back office with a quarter-pound of marijuana spread out on the counter. They say he had a big bag of pot, a scale and a smaller bag of pot, and apparently had been packaging the marijuana for resale.

He's charged with possession of marijuana with intent to distribute.

Poor turtle!!!!

2 toddlers sneak out, trash nearby residence

Canadian Press
Nov. 9, 2005 10:30 AM LISTOWEL, Ont. - A pair of toddlers are giving new meaning to the terrible twos.

The boys wandered away from a home in this town north of Stratford on Tuesday and carved a path of destruction through another.

Provincial police said they'd never seen anything quite like it.

"They did a lot of damage for two little boys," said Const. Randy Clarkson.

"And they didn't even seem to be the slightest bit put out by the whole deal."

After slipping out of their home, police said the two-year-old cousins entered and "ransacked" a nearby bungalow, emptying the contents of the refrigerator onto the floor, rummaging through a bedroom and breaking a sheet of drywall.

One of the boys even deposited his diaper in a basement aquarium housing three turtles. The turtles were not injured.

Police said the pair may have been on the lam for as long as three hours.

They were only discovered missing after police arrived at the boys' home shortly before noon on an unrelated matter and found a door wide open and two adults sound asleep inside.

"I can't believe that two two-year-olds did all this," homeowner Eileen Peppler said Tuesday night as she tried to decide where to begin the cleanup.

"I still can't believe it."

Peppler thinks the children got in through a sliding door, which they shut behind them before proceeding to run amok.

"As far as the parents are concerned, we're not done with this investigation," Clarkson said.

Cop-Donut Photo Quest Lands Man On Scavenger Hunt In Jail

FRUITPORT TOWNSHIP, Mich. -- "Part of the scavenger hunt was to get a picture of a cop eating a doughnut. They wanted to know if one of the officers would be willing to get their picture taken," police chief Paul Smutz told The Muskegon Chronicle.A man on a scavenger hunt entered a police station hoping to get a photo of an officer eating a doughnut. Instead he was thrown in jail.

Officers Bryan Rypstra and Jon Durell heard a knock at the station's back door Saturday evening. A man and a woman said they were on a scavenger hunt with another woman who had gone to a nearby store to buy a doughnut.

"Part of the scavenger hunt was to get a picture of a cop eating a doughnut. They wanted to know if one of the officers would be willing to get their picture taken," police chief Paul Smutz told The Muskegon Chronicle.

The officers planned to play along, and they chatted with the man and woman while waiting for the doughnut run. The man, Louis Jasick, recognized Rypstra, a high school classmate.

Durell then remembered seeing Jasick's name on a flier that had been posted in the station only a day earlier. Jasick was wanted on two felony warrants for failing to pay $5,000 in child support.

Jasick was listed as a flight risk, so the officers invited him inside and arrested him.

Jasick, 34, a resident of the Muskegon County township, was arraigned Monday in 60th District Court and released on two $2,000 bonds, one for each count.

Imagine if this was ABC!!

TV station broadcast porn instead of news

Viewers tuning in for the evening news in India were shocked when they were left watching a Russian porn movie.

Angry residents in Kailaras, who wanted to watch an English-language news report, blame the mix-up on technicians from the Kailaras relay station.

They believe the workers had been using the station's facilities to watch XXX films broadcast from Russia.

Hundreds of locals took to the streets afterwards demanding the technicians be sacked.

TV station regional manager Man Singh Verma said: "An initial probe confirms negligence on the part of the relay station staff in transmitting pornographic material from a Russian TV channel instead of the news from Indian channel DD-1.

"We are taking statements from staff members and punitive action will be taken against those responsible."

Source: http://www.ananova.com/

You Know You Grew Up In The 80's If...

1. You've ever ended a sentence with the word "PSYCHE".

2. You watched the Pound Puppies.

3. You can sing the rap to the "Fresh Prince of Belair " ...and can do the "Carlton".

4. Girls wore biker shorts under their skirts and felt stylishly sexy.

5. You yearned to be a member of the Baby-sitters club and tried to start a club of your own.

6. You owned those lil' Strawberry Shortcake pals scented dolls.

7. You know that "WOAH " comes from Joey on Blossom.

8. Two words: Hammer Pants.

9. If you ever watched "Fraggle Rock ".

10. You had plastic streamers on your handle bars... and "spokey-dokes" or playing cards on your spokes for that incredible sound effect.

11. You can sing the entire theme song to "Duck Tales". (Woo ooh!)

12. When it was actually worth getting up early on a Saturday to watch cartoons.

13. You wore a ponytail on the side of your head.

14. You saw the original "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles " on the big screen... and still know the turtles names.

15. You got super-excited when it was Oregon Trail day in computer class at school.

16. You made your mom buy one of those clips that would hold your shirt in a knot on the side.

17. You played the game "MASH ". (Mansion, Apartment, Shelter, House)

18. You wore stonewashed Jordache jean jackets and were proud of it.

19. L.A. Gear... need I say more.

20. You wanted to change your name to "JEM " in Kindergarten. (She's truly outrageous)

21. You remember reading "Tales of a fourth grade nothing " and all the Ramona books.

22. You know the profound meaning of "WAX ON, WAX OFF".

23. You wanted to be a Goonie.

24. You ever wore fluorescent clothing. (some of us... head-to-toe)

25. You can remember what Michael Jackson looked like before his nose fell off and his cheeks shifted.

26. You have ever pondered why Smurfette was the only female smurf.

27. You took lunch boxes to school... and traded Garbage Pail Kids in the schoolyard.

28. You remember the CRAZE, then the BANNING of slap bracelets.

29. You still get the urge to say "NOT " after every sentence.

30. You remember Hypercolor t-shirts.

31. Barbie and the Rockers was your favorite band.

32. You thought She-ra (Princess of Power!) and He-Man should hookup.

33. You thought your childhood friends would never leave because you exchanged handmade friendship bracelets.

34. You ever owned a pair of Jelly-Shoes. (and like #24, probably in neon colors, too)

35. After you saw Pee-Wee's Big Adventure you kept saying "I know you are, but what am I?"

36. You remember "I've fallen and I can't get up"

37. You remember going to the skating rink before there were inline skates.

38. You ever got seriously injured on a Slip and Slide.

39. You have ever played with a Skip-It.

40. You had or attended a birthday party at McDonalds.

41. You've gone through this nodding your head in agreement.

42. You remember Popples.

43. "Don't worry, be happy"

44. You wore like, EIGHT pairs of socks over tights with high top Reeboks.

45. You wore socks scrunched down (and sometimes still do...getting yelled at by "younger hip" members of the family)

46. "Miss MARY MACK MACK MACK, all dressed in BLACK BLACK BLACK "

47. You remember boom boxes. and walking around with one on your shoulder like you were all that.

48. You remember watching both "Gremlins" movies.

49. You know what it meant to say "Care Bear Stare!"

50. You remember watching "Rainbow Bright" and "My Little Pony Tales "

51. You thought Doogie Howser/Samantha Micelli was hot.

52. You remember Alf, the lil furry brown alien from Melmac.

53. You remember New Kids on the Block when they were cool... and don't even flinch when people refer to them as "NKOTB".

54. You knew all the characters names and their life stories on "Saved By the Bell ", the ORIGINAL class.

55. You know all the words to Bon Jovi - SHOT THROUGH THE HEART.

56. You just sang those words to yourself.

57.You remember watching Magic vs. Bird.

58. Homemade Levi shorts. (the shorter the better)

59. You remember when mullets were cool!

60. You had a mullet!

61. You still sing "We are the World"

62. You tight rolled your jeans.

63. You owned a bannana clip.

64. You remember "Where's the Beef?"

65. You used to (and probably still do) say "What you talkin' about Willis?"

66. You had big hair and you knew how to use it.

67. You're still singing shot through the heart in your head,aren't you!

This guy is allowed to preach in this country? And lead our kids??

I got this post from a local morning show web site.

A-HOLE SOLDIER HATER
TODAY'S A-HOLE OF THE CENTURY. . . THE BAPTIST WHO BELIEVES GOD IS KILLING U.S. SOLDIERS BECAUSE THE U.S. PROTECTS HOMOSEXUALS:


FRED PHELPS, the leader of the Westboro Baptist Church in Kansas and his 100 or so fellow church members believe that when a U.S. soldier is killed overseas, it's because God is punishing the U.S. for being kind to homosexuals. (?!?!?!?) And they like to share this belief with the families of soldiers who have died in combat.

On Tuesday, a funeral service was held in Chelsea, Oklahoma, for Staff Sgt. John Glen Doles, who was killed with five other soldiers last week in Afghanistan. Fred Phelps and five other ignorant idiots from the Westboro Baptist Church showed up to PROTEST the funeral. They brought signs that read. . .


God Hates The U.S.A. . . . God Is An American Terrorist . . . Thank God For Dead Soldiers. . . You're Going To Hell. . . and. . . America
Is Doomed.


Fortunately, some veterans groups caught wind of the planned protest. And thus. . . more than 100 Veterans of Foreign Wars showed up on their Harleys outside the funeral and revved their engines so that the friends and family of the slain soldier wouldn't have to be subjected to the noise from the "Christian" protesters. (ClaremoreDailyProgress.com)



This guy, Fred Phelps, is such a nut-job. . . he has a long history of claiming that God hates Jews. . . God hates gays. . . and God hates SWEDEN. He also openly supported Saddam Hussein because of Saddam's hatred for America. . . which Phelps claims is the modern-day Sodom. It's almost not worth giving him any more PR. But if you're like ME, then you want to do EVERYTHING YOU CAN TO MAKE THIS GUY'S LIFE A LIVING HELL!!


Below you can find a link to his and his church's websites along with a link to his EMAIL AND HOME ADDRESS. What you do with it is up to you BUT, if you're like me, you will send as much porn as you can.


Ok, now you all know how the First Amendment is important to me, but this crosses the line. This guy needs to be sent OUT OF OUR COUNTRY NOW!!

GOD BLESS OUR SERVICE MEN AND WOMEN!!

Do everything you can to support them, INCLUDING making this guys life hell. PLEASE send him an email and let him know how wrong he is.

MAD MAX
Mad Max Morning Show

	CLICK HERE FOR THE GOD HATES AMERICA WEBSITE....
	EMAIL THESE ASSHOLES HERE...
	CLICK HERE TO GET THE MAILING ADDRESS AND PHONE NUMBER

At least this blonde can read!!

A few days ago I was having some work done at the local Ford Dealership. A blonde came in and asked for a seven-hundred-ten.
We all looked at each other and another customer asked, "What is a seven-hundred-ten?"
She replied, "You know, the little piece in the middle of the engine, I have lost it and need a new one." She said that she did not know what it was but this piece had always been there.
He gave her a piece of paper and a pen and asked her to draw what the piece looked like. She drew a circle and in the middle of it wrote 710. He then took her over to another car, which had its hood up and asked, "Is there a 710 on this car?"

She pointed and said, "Of course, it's right there."

I want my $2!!!!!

Ohio Police Arrest Woman For $1 In Unpaid Taxes

Unfiled City Tax Forms Also Cited In Case

LOVELAND, Ohio -- An Ohio woman was arrested after she didn't pay just more than $1 that she owed in income taxes, WLWT-TV in Cincinnati reported.Deborah Combs owed the city of Loveland $1.16 last year, but she also hadn't filed her city income tax forms in five years, the television station said.She said officers pulled her over and acted as though she were a violent criminal."One sheriff approached my car with his hand on his gun," she said. "Another from the other side of the car leaned in and said, 'Are you Deborah Combs?' He said, 'We have a warrant for your arrest.' I was absolutely shocked."Combs said she thinks the arrest and charges are over-the-top for the amount she owed."What they've spent in stamps is more than what I owe," she said.She could also end up paying hundreds of dollars in fines for the unfiled tax forms, the television station reported.Loveland City Manager Fred Enderle said the amount Combs owes isn't the real issue."Whether it's $1 they owe us or $1,000, it's not fair to the rest of the public to not pursue that person," he said. "There is some expense involved, but it goes back to the principle. We have laws. The laws have to be complied with. At what cost do you stop enforcing the law?"Combs is scheduled to appear in court Oct. 20.

Distributed by Internet Broadcasting Systems, Inc. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.

Guess they thought the movie "Reefer Madness" was a reality show!

This is fucked up!!!! A crack addict who can get a Barbara Walters special is living the life, but this guy who had to move to Canada of all places gets yanked from his hospital bed just for smoking some Ganja????

Judge Releases Patient Arrested in B.C. Hospital
By Gene Johnson, Associated Press
Source: Associated Press

Seattle, WA -- A U.S. Army veteran who fled to Canada to avoid prosecution because he grew marijuana to help control chronic pain was yanked from a hospital by Canadian authorities, driven to the U.S. border with a catheter still attached, and turned over to U.S. officials who provided him with no medical treatment for five days, his lawyer said.

Steven William Tuck, 38, was still fitted with the urinary catheter when he shuffled into U.S. District Court for a detention hearing Wednesday, said his lawyer, Douglas Hiatt.

U.S. Magistrate Judge James P. Donohue ordered Tuck temporarily released so that Hiatt and Sunil Aggarwal, the president of Washington Physicians for Social Responsibility, could take him to Harborview Medical Center for treatment.

"The guy comes into the jail with a catheter ..., you'd think they'd do something about it!" Hiatt said, launching into a profanity-laced tirade after the hearing. "This is totally inhumane. He's been tortured for days for no reason."

Tuck is a veteran who said he suffered debilitating injuries in the late 1980s, when his parachute failed to open during a jump. He spent a year at Walter Reed Army Medical Center undergoing operations to fuse discs in his back, Hiatt said. His injuries were exacerbated in a car crash that killed his brother-in-law in 1990; over the years, he has had more than a dozen surgeries, his friends said.

In 2001, he was living in McKinleyville, Calif., when his marijuana growing operation was raided for the second time. He fled to British Columbia to avoid prosecution, and sought asylum status, which was recently denied.

Last Friday, he checked himself in to St. Paul's Hospital in Vancouver, British Columbia, because he had a cyst on his prostate and was having difficulty urinating, Hiatt said.

In a phone interview from Vancouver, Richard Cowan, a friend of Tuck's who runs the Web site marijuananews.com, said he was with Tuck at the hospital when Canadian authorities arrived and arrested Tuck on a departure order.

"I would not believe it unless I had seen it," Cowan said. "They sent people in to arrest him while he was on a gurney. They took him out of the hospital in handcuffs, put him in an SUV, and drove him to the border."

He was turned over to Whatcom County Jail officials, who, after being flooded with phone calls from activists, called federal marshals from Seattle to pick him up. The marshals brought him to the King County Jail in downtown Seattle.

Though Tuck had taken morphine as prescribed by doctors for about 16 years to help with his pain, he was given no painkiller or treatment at the jail other than ibuprofen, Hiatt said. Tuck, who appeared emaciated as he cried in court Wednesday, has been sick from the morphine withdrawal, Hiatt said.

A message left with the public relations officers at the King County Jail was not immediately returned Wednesday, and a spokesman with the Royal Canadian Mounted Police in Vancouver said he could not immediately comment on the case.

Tuck is charged federally with unlawful flight to avoid prosecution. Donohue released him on the condition that he face the charge in the Northern District of California upon his release from the hospital. The U.S. attorney's office in Seattle did not oppose his release.

14 Things You Really Should Have Done Before Getting Married

1. Watch yourself eating in front of a mirror. If you're put off, that's the view your future partner will have...

2. Live on your own. It's important that you find out what a hopeless slob you are before your beloved tells you. And then leaves you...

3. Go out with your friends for a "quick drink" and stagger home three days later...

4. Have a holiday romance with someone who doesn't speak a word of English. Who needs conversation?

5. Women: Take the soft toys off your bed. Nothing turns a man off more than performing in front of an audience of beady-eyed teddies...

6. Men: Get rid of those "How to Get Girls Even Though You're Poor and Ugly' books. They never work anyway...

7. Gobble the last slice of pizza without having to go through the 'No you have it, no really... Are you sure you don't mind...?

8. Walk about the house naked, without having to hold any bits in...

9. Have friends of the opposite sex. After marriage, it's too much effort to keep saying: "No, I really don't fancy them"...

10. Men: Enjoy that wardrobe space while you can! You will not believe the vast number of shoes that one woman needs...

11. Women: Fill in silly magazine quizzes with titles like 'Are You Seductive', without having to listen to loud laughter from your partner (who then runs off with the magazine)...

12. Men: Get rid of anything inflatable and female-shaped...

13. Relish clipping your toenails straight onto the carpet...

14. Remember that your best option with in-laws is to marry an orphan...

Wonder how he got around the filters???

Man in Underwear Arrested Inside School

BRIDGEPORT, Conn. (AP) -- A 31-year-old man is facing burglary charges after being caught inside the Bridge Academy charter school in his underwear. Police said they were responding to an alarm at the school at about 8:15 a.m. Sunday when they found William Hoskins apparently downloading pornography on an office computer.

A duffel bag, clothing and a wallet containing Hoskins' ID, were found on the floor nearby, along with a bucket of urine, police said.

Police said Hoskins told them he went into the school to use the bathroom.

He was held in lieu of $500 bond for an appearance in Superior Court Tuesday.

I bet someone isnt getting a bonus this month!!!

Mistake Leads to 29-Cent Gas Price at Station in Lincoln, Neb.

The Associated Press

LINCOLN, Neb. - One gas station manager's mistake paid off for Lincoln drivers who were in the right place at the right time Friday.

For 30 to 45 minutes, three of the Kabredlo's Convenience Store's four pumps sold premium unleaded gas for 29 cents a gallon.

Gas hasn't been that cheap since 1955, according to AAA Nebraska.

As news of the cheap fuel spread, lines formed at the store at 2305 R St., said Max Wolfe, who was doing landscaping for Kabredlo's.

Wolfe and his co-workers took time out to fill up. "I was on E, and I filled my tank up for $4," Wolfe said. "It made my day."

Nathan Olson said he usually pays $72 to fill his gas-guzzling 1998 Ford F-150. Friday, he filled the tank three-quarters full for $3.50.

The store manager who said she made the mistake didn't give her name.

On average, Lincoln gas stations are charging $2.93 a gallon for gas, according to AAA.

Information from: Lincoln Journal Star, http://www.journalstar.com

Wanna crack my nuts???

Crack-crazed squirrels terrorise South London

By Lester Haines (lester.haines at theregister.co.uk)

Published Monday 10th October 2005 09:56 GMT

Stop me if you've heard this one: crack-addicted squirrels are terrorising Brixton in Sarf London in a desperate search for a fix, eschewing their traditional nuts and digging up residents' front gardens in what appears to be a credible zoological threat to the Yardies' hard-drug hegemony.

Yup, crack dealers and addicts have apparently taken to burying their stashes in people's gardens in the streets around the centre of Brixton after a police clampdown drove them from the thriving commercial heart of the popular London district. Locals have spotted squirrels digging in the same gardens, prompting speculation that they are already addicted to rocks and will in due course take up semi-automatic weapons and launch a violent challenge for the whole trade in illicit narcotics, as is the local custom.

One fearful resident, who asked not to be named, told Life Style Extra: "I was chatting with my neighbour who told me that crack users and dealers sometimes use my front garden to hide bits of their stash. An hour earlier I'd seen a squirrel wandering round the garden, digging in the flowerbeds. It looked like it knew what it was looking for. It was ill-looking and its eyes looked bloodshot but it kept on desperately digging. It was almost as if it was trying to find hidden crack rocks."

The RSPCA said it had no reports of the "Brixton Crack Squirrel", but did not completely dismiss the idea. A spokeswoman said: "We have not had any dealers reporting the theft of their stash by squirrels but the animal is attracted by smell and if it detects something it likes it will dig it up. If a squirrel did open a bag of crack and start consuming it there is no doubt it would die pretty quickly. I suspect that nobody has reported it because they are a wild animal and when they are found dead no-one cares."

That's right - just another junkie off the streets, permanently.

But hold a minute: this fearful tale bears an uncanny resemblance to reports knocking about on the internet of similar cocaine-fuelled squirrels menacing New York and Washington DC. Urban myth or chilling portent? After all, it's a small step from crack squirrels to flocks of PCP-demented pigeons descending Hitchcock-style on the World's major centres of population. Consider yourselves warned. ®

Its gettin hot in herre....... So letz take off our pajamaz

Just a little chilli for a good nap

10-10-2005

From: The Daily Telegraph

DIETS high in chilli may help people nod off at night and bound out of bed more energetically in the morning.

Tasmanian physiologist Andrew Davies surveyed 25 volunteers on a controlled meal plan for four weeks and compared them on the same diet but with 30g of chopped chilli added daily.

Although their sleep quality appeared to be similar on both diets, Dr Davies said the participants felt they were able to fall asleep easier when taking chilli.

"They also said they woke better and seemed to have a bit more energy and were able to function better during the day," he said after addressing the Australasian Sleep Association conference on the Gold Coast which ended yesterday.

Dr Davies said eight of the volunteers were fitted with equipment designed to measure their movement for five days.

He found that, on the spicy diet, they recorded fewer movements during sleep and tended not to sleep quite as long, yet they had more energy during the day.

The study was too small to draw any definitive judgments about the effect of chilli on sleep, but Dr Davies hopes to continue the research using more volunteers.

Whats Next??? Botox for Garfield??

Neuter my dog? Well, nuts to that!
By DOUG LUNNEY -- Sun Media

Hogan's heroes ... Hogan the Rottweiler eyes a pair of Neuticles, prosthetic dog testicles that have the potential to restore at least some of his former glory. -- Joe Klamar, WINNIPEG SUN


Greg Miller cringed when his beloved bloodhound Buck was about to be neutered.
Then a nutty idea came to mind.

Less than two years later -- in December 1995 -- a Rottweiler in Independence, Mo., named Max received the first pair of Neuticles, which are testicular implants for neutered dogs, cats, horses and bulls.

Now that he's got the balls rolling, Neuticles are becoming more common outside the United States, says Miller, admitting he sent a pair of Neuticles to a woman in Prince George, B.C., last week (presumably for her dog) and he's getting more and more clients in Canada.

"We've done 35,000 pets worldwide and not one single problem. No complications of any type," he boasts.

Any veterinarian can implant Neuticles -- they just have to have the -- uh -- testicles to do it.
"It's real simple (surgery)," he says. "Normally it's done when the pet is neutered and the neutering procedure, of course, was developed in the early 1800s. The open castration technique that the vet uses requires the permanent removal of the pet's testicles. That's where Neuticles come in.

"When the vet neuters the pet ... they slip in the Neuticles and the pet looks exactly the same."
The obvious question: "Why?"

"Why not?" Miller replies. "Where is it written that the pet has to lose its testicles? Getting neutered is bad enough, but to add insult to injury by leaving the poor little guy with nothing ... For $30 to $37 (US), your pet can look the same.

"People don't want their pet to look emasculated. With any breed of dog that's short-haired, it's part of their personality."

Miller has a degree in journalism and he was an editor at a newspaper in Loveland, Colo., before working in sales for 13 years with a candy company.

When the type of candy he was selling lost its popularity, he invented Neuticles. He has since introduced five sizes and three models, all made of polypropylene -- a material that coats some human implants and surgical equipment.

"A lot of pet owners wanted a softer, more natural testicle, so a year ago we came out with our Neuticle Natural, and it's an exact replication of the canine testicle," Miller says. "It's softer, as lifelike as can be."

Clients wanted an even softer model, which led to last week's introduction of the "marshmallow soft" Neuticle Ultra, he says.

Miller is writing a book about his invention, called Going Nuts. Meanwhile, potential clients can learn about his product on his Web site (www.neuticles.com), which also offers merchandise such as ball caps, T-shirts and watches.

"You'll never lose your keys again with a Neuticle key ring," Miller vows. "And I dare you to pull it out at some Sunday dinner and say 'Guess what this is?' "

Meanwhile, veterinarian Philipp Schott isn't convinced testicular implants for animals are a good idea. "I would just hands-down refuse to do it," Schott says. "It's human vanity. It doesn't benefit the dog in any way.

"Although it would be minor surgery to implant them, nonetheless it's surgery and I don't see the point in doing unnecessary surgery -- exposing the patient to risks, anesthetics. Although modern anesthetics are extremely safe, it's not a zero risk-type of procedure."

When told most Neuticles are implanted during the neutering process, Schott says he wouldn't want to keep an animal under anesthetic longer than necessary. He also voiced concerns about long-term effects.

Where is it written that the pet has to lose its testicles?

Guess he didnt really need a title loan!

Naked, bleeding man arrested in Darlington Check 'n Go

By CHARLES TOMLINSON

Morning News

Friday, October 7, 2005

Darlington police responded to an alarm at a check-advance business where they found a naked man who’d slipped into the building through an air vent in an apparent burglary attempt.

Michael Gilbert, 22, of 602 Joe Louise Blvd., Darlington, faces burglary charges in connection with the incident, Darlington Police Lt. Danny Watson said.

Officers responded to the Check ’n Go at 508-2 Pearl St. at 12:40 a.m. Thursday and found interior roof tiles, insulation, wires and metal braces hanging from the roof as well as lying on the floor, according to reports. The door and windows were closed.

Shortly afterward, the reporting officer noticed a foot hanging from the roof.

The officer reported that he noticed the man moving along the interior ceiling tiles before jumping to the floor of the business. The man was naked and bleeding from his feet and had cuts and scrapes all over his body, as well, according to police reports.

The man then tried to open the door and leave, and officers ordered him to sit on the floor, the report shows. When a keyholder arrived, the officers went inside and handcuffed the man. He was later taken to a local hospital and treated before authorities took him to the Darlington County Detention Center, where he was booked on burglary charges.

The suspect probably got into the business by climbing or falling down the air conditioner shaft and onto the interior roof tiles, according to the police report. He likely was naked so he would more easily slide through the air vent, Watson said.

The Darlington Fire Department said its ladder truck was inoperable, so officers were unable to reach the roof to get the suspect’s clothing or secure the overturned air-conditioning unit, the report shows.

The business doesn’t keep money after hours. Police were able to respond quickly because of the alarm system, which every business should have, Watson said.

Guess I cant walk around in my loincloth anymore!

MEDFORD, Ore. - A registered sex offender who fashioned a loin cloth from a rope and piece of lawn furniture was arrested near a high school, where he asked four girls for a ride to the mall or a motel, police said.

Kelly James Bailey, 33, of Greenwater, Wash., was wearing only the rope when he shocked a Medford woman by appearing in her back yard Thursday morning.

Before he left, Bailey, who appeared to be covered in feces, ran away with a strip of leopard-print vinyl peeled from the seat of lawn chair, said Medford police Lt. Mike Moran.

More than an hour later, four North Medford High School girls were waiting in a car near the school when Bailey now wearing blue jeans, but still covered in the apparent fecal matter approached the car. He asked the girls for a ride to the Red Carpet Inn or the Rogue Valley Mall.

"The girls wisely rolled up their windows and left," Moran said.

The girls alerted authorities, who spotted Bailey running near campus.

"When we caught him, he still appeared to be covered in fecal matter," Moran said. "He told us, though, he was partying with girls the night before and somehow ended up rolling around in tomato paste."

As officers patted him down, they found that he had used the rope and vinyl strip to make a primitive loin cloth.

"I think it's definitely the strangest case of the day," Moran said.

Bailey was lodged in Jackson County Jail on charges of theft, trespassing, criminal mischief and failing to register as a sex offender in Oregon. He was held on $24,000 bail.

The theft charge was for allegedly taking the vinyl strip, Moran said.

Information from: Mail Tribune, http://www.mailtribune.com/

Copyright 2005 The Associated Press. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed.

And I thought I had an old beater!!!

I love my 85 Celebrity (Cant kill the damn thing!!) I have owned 3 of them. But nothing compares to this guy!!!

Man figures $10 Ford bought in '30s is his car for life

Associated Press
Oct. 3, 2005 08:25 AM

SHELTON, Conn. - Clarence Curtiss isn't the kind of guy to trade in his car every few years. He still has his first car, a 1929 Model A Ford he bought during the Depression for $10. He jokes people have offered to triple his money. But the 82-year-old Connecticut man says he won't sell his Model A, not even for a million bucks.

More than 60 years ago, Curtiss carved his and his then girlfriend's initials in the steering wheel. That girl was his wife of 56 years, until Curtiss became a widower in 1998.

Curtiss was an auto dealer and collected more than two dozens cars over the years. But he says none of his cars was as special as his first.

Guess "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" is an American thing!

Soldiers have front line sex orgy
From: Agence France-Presse
From correspondents in Nicosia

September 30, 2005


GREEK Cypriot soldiers involved in a wild sex party at a guard post on the divided Mediterranean islands Green Line were banished to remote corners of the country as punishment, a newspaper has reported.

Politics Daily said up to 10 army recruits were involved in an all-night romp in the Nicosia sector of the no-man's land with a mother-of-three who had them queuing up for more.

"The soldiers formed an orderly line outside the room waiting to have sex one-by-one. At one point two soldiers came along to serve food, even they didn't leave unsatisfied," it said.

Although the woman happily went through the ranks, from lowly privates to the officer in charge, military top brass frowned on her escapades.

The troops were undone when one of the participants decided to capture the moment with his mobile phone and forwarded the video images to fellow recruits.

Army chiefs got wind of what was going on and an internal inquiry was launched.
Those involved were disciplined and had time added on to their length of service, which is 24 months for conscripts, Politis said.

The Greek Cypriot national guard declined to comment on the report.

Cyprus has been divided into Greek- and Turkish-Cypriot sectors since 1974, when Turkish troops seized its northern third in response to an Athens-engineered Greek Cypriot coup aimed at uniting the island with Greece.